Chemobrain - It really is REAL!
I know that I have blamed my memory loss or loss for words in the middle of a sentence, to many of my family, friends and co-workers, on something called chemobrain. Well, I want you to know that I didn't make it up. It really does exist and I was not a believer until it started happening to me. I thought I would share with you what one person describes it to be:
"Patients who receive treatment for cancer often experience a range of side-effects, including loss of concentration, memory problems, and the inability to organize daily activities—commonly referred to as chemobrain."
See, I'm not really just "losing it", I will eventually get my crisp, clear, brain back as soon as I have completed chemo.
Which brings me to my second reason for posting.....I've had a very slight bump in the road, and I have to postpone my chemo treatments so I can deal with an awful dental issue. Instead of having chemo tomorrow, I will be enjoying myself at the dentist, getting a root canal. Ick.
But, the good news is, I should still be able to keep my next appt. on March 15th which will only set me back 2 weeks. I can live with that. But I cannot live with the pain that I have been for over 2 weeks.
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Monday, February 26, 2007
Finally able to post!
I have had a really hard time even thinking about posting on this blog. It's so hard to even think about cancer and chemo treatments these days without getting nauseous! Every time I go online and see any kind of cancer drug ad or anything related, I get so sick to my stomach. My body is just so loaded with toxins now that the mere association makes me ill.
This last treatment really got me, worse than #3. Everything that my Oncologist told me at my very first appointment is all really making sense to me. Like clockwork, my body is giving in to the cumulative treatments. I was told to watch out from #3 and #4. It took me a week to come back from #3 and #4 was worse. I tried so hard to do that mind over matter thing this past week but it just didn't work. Once I realized that, then I really gave in and listened to my body. I finally did what I was supposed to do and that was to give in to my pain, my fatigue and my inability to do much more than lie in bed.
I started working 2 days from home last week and I had to do it in my pj's in my bed. But ya know what? I got things done and boy did it wear me out! One day I took at 3 hour nap and the next was 4 1/2 hours. I guess I just didn't realize how little energy I have and I try to push it. That's just me. I've always pushed the envelope when it comes to myself and my health. But, being a Mom, a wife and working full time doesn't allow you to worry about yourself. I'm sure there are lots of Mom's who can relate. I can tell you that after living with this illness for 4 months now, from now on I will listen to my body and take care of me! We only get one shot at life so we have to live it feeling GOOD!
I have had a really hard time even thinking about posting on this blog. It's so hard to even think about cancer and chemo treatments these days without getting nauseous! Every time I go online and see any kind of cancer drug ad or anything related, I get so sick to my stomach. My body is just so loaded with toxins now that the mere association makes me ill.
This last treatment really got me, worse than #3. Everything that my Oncologist told me at my very first appointment is all really making sense to me. Like clockwork, my body is giving in to the cumulative treatments. I was told to watch out from #3 and #4. It took me a week to come back from #3 and #4 was worse. I tried so hard to do that mind over matter thing this past week but it just didn't work. Once I realized that, then I really gave in and listened to my body. I finally did what I was supposed to do and that was to give in to my pain, my fatigue and my inability to do much more than lie in bed.
I started working 2 days from home last week and I had to do it in my pj's in my bed. But ya know what? I got things done and boy did it wear me out! One day I took at 3 hour nap and the next was 4 1/2 hours. I guess I just didn't realize how little energy I have and I try to push it. That's just me. I've always pushed the envelope when it comes to myself and my health. But, being a Mom, a wife and working full time doesn't allow you to worry about yourself. I'm sure there are lots of Mom's who can relate. I can tell you that after living with this illness for 4 months now, from now on I will listen to my body and take care of me! We only get one shot at life so we have to live it feeling GOOD!
Friday, February 16, 2007
Major Milestone!!!!
Yesterday marked my half way point for treatments! It seems to good to be true that I have already been through 3 1/2 months of surgeries, numerous appts, and now I am half way through my chemotherapy. I start a new medication on March 1 and I finish April 12th if all goes as well as it has. Meaning, my counts have all been great, I've managed to stay healthy (outside of the horrendous side effects of chemo) and I haven't had to miss one treatment! I am just cruising through but not without feeling the effects, as you all know.
Yesterday while we were at treatment, there was a lot of loud clapping and cheers and I quickly realized it was for the people that were completing their treatments! Good for them. I'm sure it was an incredible feeling for them. I had the same incredible feeling walking out of there knowing that I was half way there!!
My doctor was very good to me at this visit. He was very concerned and not pleased with the amount of pain that I endure every treatment after my Nuelasta shot. He increased my pain meds and made it quite clear that I am to take them, period. I have a hard time taking a lot of
pain pills. But, if it means salvaging a little bit of my 3 days following treatment, then I suppose I'll give it a shot.
Yesterday marked my half way point for treatments! It seems to good to be true that I have already been through 3 1/2 months of surgeries, numerous appts, and now I am half way through my chemotherapy. I start a new medication on March 1 and I finish April 12th if all goes as well as it has. Meaning, my counts have all been great, I've managed to stay healthy (outside of the horrendous side effects of chemo) and I haven't had to miss one treatment! I am just cruising through but not without feeling the effects, as you all know.
Yesterday while we were at treatment, there was a lot of loud clapping and cheers and I quickly realized it was for the people that were completing their treatments! Good for them. I'm sure it was an incredible feeling for them. I had the same incredible feeling walking out of there knowing that I was half way there!!
My doctor was very good to me at this visit. He was very concerned and not pleased with the amount of pain that I endure every treatment after my Nuelasta shot. He increased my pain meds and made it quite clear that I am to take them, period. I have a hard time taking a lot of
pain pills. But, if it means salvaging a little bit of my 3 days following treatment, then I suppose I'll give it a shot.
Friday, February 09, 2007
Round 3 was pretty rough on me!
It's been a week since I have been able to post. This round really knocked me down for a while. I experienced the agonizing pain from the Nuelasta shot again . That gets me from Friday night until sometime Monday. I literally cannot move, my body hurts so much. I don't think there were any side effects from the Procrid shot to boost my red blood counts, thank goodness!
There was a mix up at the pharmacy and my precious anti-nausea pills got a bit messed up so I paid for that dearly. I have been incredibly nauseous since last Friday. I did have an ok day yesterday and so far today, I am just really exhausted with just a little nausea.
Jeff was away on business for a couple days this week. What a long 2 days! I missed him alot. My friend Kim came and played nursemaid with her 4 year old, that was sweet and so appreciated. My mother came up Tuesday to do the same. She even stayed over with me which was really sweet. My kids are a great help to me, when they are home. Frankie did pass on a basketball practice to stay with me. What a sweet son. Alyssa has been great too. We've been able to spend a little bonding time together when she gets home from practice and climbs in bed with me! At 15, I should be very grateful that she still does that occasionally.
Anyway....I will be posting a couple "choice" pics from the hat party....what a great day!
Stay tuned....
It's been a week since I have been able to post. This round really knocked me down for a while. I experienced the agonizing pain from the Nuelasta shot again . That gets me from Friday night until sometime Monday. I literally cannot move, my body hurts so much. I don't think there were any side effects from the Procrid shot to boost my red blood counts, thank goodness!
There was a mix up at the pharmacy and my precious anti-nausea pills got a bit messed up so I paid for that dearly. I have been incredibly nauseous since last Friday. I did have an ok day yesterday and so far today, I am just really exhausted with just a little nausea.
Jeff was away on business for a couple days this week. What a long 2 days! I missed him alot. My friend Kim came and played nursemaid with her 4 year old, that was sweet and so appreciated. My mother came up Tuesday to do the same. She even stayed over with me which was really sweet. My kids are a great help to me, when they are home. Frankie did pass on a basketball practice to stay with me. What a sweet son. Alyssa has been great too. We've been able to spend a little bonding time together when she gets home from practice and climbs in bed with me! At 15, I should be very grateful that she still does that occasionally.
Anyway....I will be posting a couple "choice" pics from the hat party....what a great day!
Stay tuned....
Thursday, February 01, 2007
#3 down! Only one more AC and then I start the 4 Taxol. I can see
the light at the end of the tunnel!
Jeff snapped a pic today from my camera phone of me relaxing as I got
my infusion. Not the best quality, but at least you can see how relaxed I am! It's not where I would rather be, but at least it is doable.
I found out that my red blood counts are low and I'm anemic. So, they added a new shot to boost my red counts and I also have to take more vitamins that include D and Calcium for my bones. I'll lift my counts come hell or high water. I am NOT getting a transfusion, thank you very much.
I'm feeling very tired, weak and very out of it from all the meds so I am off for a nap.
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